


The Fandom Menace

by Beltenebra



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, Kanjani8 (Band)
Genre: Crack, Eito Shenanigans, Halloween, Haunted Houses, M/M, Multi, Orgy, Phone Sex, Puns & Word Play, Shameless Smut, a dark and stormy night, unrepentant dorkery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-07
Updated: 2016-11-07
Packaged: 2018-08-29 17:59:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8499706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beltenebra/pseuds/Beltenebra
Summary: The bus breaks down on dark and rainy back highway, there is of course a creepy house. Hijinks ensue. (And by hijinks, I mean porn.)





	

It was a dark and stormy night. At least as far as Ryo could see, which wasn't far at all, vicious wind-whipped rain lashed at the windows of their bus as they drove. It wasn't the kind of weather anyone should be out traveling in. Apparently the weather authorities agreed because they had closed down the airport they had been scheduled to fly out of, leaving them to charter a tour bus to get them to their next venue. It was a pain but at least he could sleep on the bus, well he could try. Currently, Maruyama was literally bouncing between the seats a few rows up, having already discovered that he couldn't quite squeeze himself into the overhead luggage rack. Ohkura had shot him a sidelong glance, sizing him up and probably coming to the conclusion that Ryo would fit just fine but Ryo had quelled that with an epic glare before he could announce his idea to the bus at large.

So he could probably sleep if he wanted to risk waking up and finding himself in some uncomfortable and likely compromising position. Which he didn't. He heaved a sigh, dialed up the volume on his mp3 player, and pulled his hood further down over his eyes. Just as he squirmed into a comfortable position, having wedged his bag between himself and the window to use as a makeshift pillow, a loud bang sounded and the whole bus shook with the unmistakable tremors of _something wrong with the engine_. The driver steered the bus off to the side of the dark highway as it gently rolled to a stop. Ryo pushed his hood back and peered up towards the front, what he could make out in the gloom looked like a lot of black smoke. Great.

They had just started to settle themselves in for a wait while the driver took care of whatever was wrong with the bus when their manager made his way to the back looking a sheepish and a bit nervous. Yoko spoke up first, deadpanning for effect, "Let me guess. There's something wrong with the bus."

The manager sucked his breath in a way that did not reassure Ryo that this was standard "it will up and running in just a short time" kind of trouble. His suspicion was confirmed a moment later.

"Well, you see, I just spoke with the driver and there seems to be some kind of engine trouble." Seven blank stares seemed to communicate that they could have guessed that much. The manager cleared his throat and forged ahead. "We don't exactly know what's wrong and the driver thinks it might be dangerous for us to stay on the bus."

They all looked out the window at the evening gloom and the driving rain then at each other. Again, Yoko vocalized their thoughts, "You want us to get off the bus and stand around in that," he jerked a thumb over his shoulder at the window behind him, "while the driver calls in someone to fix the bus?"

"Yes." Their manager hadn't been with them for years without picking up a few techniques for dealing with them, he decided to go with the direct route. "It's either that or risk the possibility of... well, exploding."

Seven pairs of eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I don't wanna explode!", Maruyama blurted out.

With those options, they really didn't have much of a choice. They grabbed their bags and trooped off the bus. With only three umbrellas between them and high winds, even huddled close together they were all nearly soaked after just a few minutes. Yasu turned to flick his wet bangs out of his eyes when a glimmer of light caught his eye.

He grabbed Maru's shoulder and stood on his tiptoes, pointing up and away behind them, "Is that a house up there? Do you think we could wait there?"

Their manager was no match for the well-honed expressions of heart-tugging misery of seven veteran idols. He trailed behind them as they trudged up the winding pathway towards what seemed to be an old house.

Ryo stayed back a bit as the others crowded up onto the porch and rang the bell. There were lights on in the windows by the door but there was no answer. "Does this seem a little suspicious to anyone else? The bus suddenly breaks down in the rain and this house is just conveniently situated on the side of an otherwise completely deserted backwoods road?"

Hina looked like he kind of wanted to agree but chose to remain optimistic for morale. "I'm sure it's nothing bad, just a perfectly reasonable series of coincidences.

Yasu had apparently decided to knock and on the second rap of his knuckles the door swung inward to reveal the warm glow of the empty entryway.

Ryo raised an eyebrow at Hina who chuckled nervously as the others cheered. "I'm sure whoever lives here won't mind us just staying for a little while to stay out of the rain," Yasu declared. The others shrugged and followed him into the house.

Ryo stopped just before the threshold and huffed his annoyance. "I just want it to go on the record that I think this is a very bad idea. This is how movie characters meet their bloody, inglorious dooms. But he still let Subaru reach back and tug him inside. Just as he cleared the door, right before their manager could follow them inside, the door swung shut with a slam that echoed through the building.

"See! I knew it. Now you're not going to be able to get that door open." Sometimes Ryo really hated being right.

"I'm sure it was just the wind, it doesn't have a lock on it or anything, see?" Hina answered. He tugged on the door and looked genuinely puzzled when it failed to budge. "Maybe it's stuck?" He dug in his heels pulled, nearly falling on his behind when the door refused to give at all.

The others were starting to look a little more concerned now, especially when Maru looked out the window and informed them that their manager was no longer standing on the porch.

Six cell phones were whipped out and met with cries of dismay as their owners realized they had no service. Ryo just stood there with his arms crossed reminding himself not to feel too smug because in this case, he would be better off being wrong.

"Well, now what should we do?"

"Fearless leader?"

"Why do I only get to be the leader when things go wrong?", Yoko grumped, but ticked ideas off on his fingers, "We should find out of there are any other doors, we should keep periodically trying to call someone who can help, I guess we should find out if anyone lives here and get the lay of the land... see if there is food and bedding. We don't know how long we'll be stuck here."

"And no one goes off by themselves!" Hina added, "Just in case, we should stay in pairs at least."

They all nodded their agreement and set off as, walking as close together as they possibly could, down the long hallway the led deeper into the house. The hallway opened into a large central room which was pretty empty, there was no furniture, no television, no decoration of any kind but the lights worked making the smooth wood of the floor glow. After a few minutes of cowering in the middle of an empty room, it seemed like nothing was going to leap out and attack them. Not right away at least.

"Right, should we take a look around?" Yasu suggested, rubbing Subaru's back reassuringly.

"I want to go find the kitchen," Ohkura spoke up. When the rest of them just looked at him he shrugged, unconcerned "What! If I'm about to get nastily killed by a horrible, scary ghost I don't want my last meal to have been a bag of shrimp crackers."

"Fair enough", grinned Maru. "I'll go with you."

Yoko nodded and looked at the rest of them, considering. "Ok, Ryo-chan. You go with Maru and Tacchon. Hina and I will go see if there is somewhere to sleep, Yasu and Baru, you guys look for a bathroom. If anyone runs into trouble... er... scream."

"So the rest of us can run in the opposite direction?" Ryo asked with a sardonic grin.

Hina frowned, "So the rest of us can _help_."

Yoko slung an arm over Hina's shoulders, "Of course. Everybody good? Ok. Let's meet back here in no more than an hour."

They all exchanged only slightly nervous nods and headed off in different directions, down the still dark hallways.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hey, this closet is full of blankets." Yoko called back over his shoulder, reaching up towards the shelf. "Help me get this stuff down." Hina bumped the door as he stepped up next to Yoko and pulled bedding down and their eyes met just as the door snicked quietly shut behind them. There were a few minutes of muttered cursing and they groped the walls for a light switch. Yoko's feet got caught in the blankets and he pitched forward, ending up on his knees. Hina made a small sound of triumph and the lights came on, revealing the fact that there was no handle on this side of the door.

"Oh good grief!" Yoko threw up his hands, "What good does it do anyone to lock us in a closet when we're _already_ locked in this stupid house." At which point one of his knees slipped in the nest of fabric and caught himself with one hand on the wall and his face in Hina's crotch.

Hina just laughed. "It's not like we've never taken advantage of a convenient closet before." He grinned and waggled his eyebrows, "Hey, while you're down there..."

"That is one of the lamest come-ons I have ever heard." Yoko rolled his eyes but he still pressed forward to nuzzle the bulge in Hina's jeans.

Hina hummed his approval as he threaded one hand through the silky dark of Yoko's hair and helpfully unzipped his jeans with the other. Yoko swatted his hand away and pulled out Hina's hard cock, pressing his lips to the flushed head as he looked up at Hina through his bangs. To his satisfaction, Hina was already panting. He steadied Hina's considerable erection with one hand at the base as he slid his lips down slowly, flicking his tongue around the shaft as he went. His other hand pressed Hina's hips back, keeping him from bucking.

He established a rhythm that Hina seemed to like because he was much more noisy than Yoko was used to. The low husky moans filling the small space combined with the image of Hina flushed and trembling, his free hand splayed against the wall for support was getting Yoko pretty hot himself.  
He pulled back and paused long enough to get Hina's attention and commanded softly, "Watch." He dropped a hand to free his own erection and stroked it roughly as he sunk his mouth back down on Hina.

Hina groaned deep and desperate but he kept his eyes locked on Yoko's as they raced towards completion. Hina's hips were leaping beneath Yoko's hand and he knew Hina must be close, his own orgasm was just out of reach, just a few strokes and- Hina bit his lip and came, spurting hot in his mouth, surprising him. He thought he had a little more time to pull away.

He swallowed with a grimace and glared up at Hina who was looking sated and a little sheepish. "Hey! You know I don't like to swallow, it tastes like nast-" he stopped in the middle of his own sentence, blinked in surprise and licked his lips. "This actually doesn't taste like nast. Why doesn't this taste like nast?"

Hina just blinked and shrugged, "Got me."

"It's not like I've never tasted come before. It's not even like I haven't tasted _your_ come before."

"I haven't changed my diet or anything. Although I really don't know how much that could possibly help."

Yoko was kind of mystified and more than a little confused. "This is really weird."

Hina's smile was amused, "We're mysteriously locked in a closet in what may just be a haunted house and you think the fact that my come doesn't gross you out is weird?"

"Yeah."

Hina's eye glinted as he sunk down to kneel in front of Yoko pushing back and palming his cock, "Shall we see if yours has changed too?" 

A few minutes later Hina was licking his lips and looking intrigued. "You're totally right. That is so weird."

Just as Yoko had pulled his mind together enough to say 'I told you so' the closet door clicked and swung open. They looked at the open door and then at each other with wide eyes.

"You didn't touch that did you, Kimi?"

"No."

"Let's get out of here as quickly as possible."

"Agreed."

~~~~~~~~~~~~

The others headed back down the hallway looking for the stairs. Ryo was glad they didn't have to go far to find the kitchen, the room was just off the main one and it only took them a few minutes to find the lights.

The kitchen was impressive, a spacious, gleaming edifice of stainless steel. Ohkura's face lit up at the sight of the massive refrigerator. Maru immediately went to poke through the drawers. Ryo chose to hover in the middle of the room, looking around for any potential threats, large pans that could fall, knives that could propel themselves towards his face.

"Listen, just look for food and don't mess around with anything unnecessary." He cautioned, watching Maru fling cupboards open.

"We had better not consider dishes necessary, because there aren't any." Maru said, turning to lean back against the counter. "Any luck on your end, Tacchon?"

Ohkura glared into the fridge. Ryo walked over to glance around him, "What's the problem, it looks full."

"It _is_ full." Ohkura turned and stepped to the side, sweeping his hand to display the contents, "But the only things in here are strawberries and whipped cream."

Maru grinned and pulled out one of the containers, "I like strawberries!"

Ohkura blinked, "Well, yeah. But isn't that kind of... weird?"

"A completely empty house stocked with pounds of perfectly fresh strawberries? Weird.", Ryo agreed.

Apparently the weirdness did not affect Ohkura's appetite because he snagged a strawberry, covered it in whipped cream and proceeded to eat it. Well, you could have called it eating. Ryo might have more accurately described it as oral molestation.

Ohkura's eyes had drifted shut as he sucked the berry between his lips and delicately bit down before swiping the tip of his tongue over his bottom lip to catch a stray drop of whipped cream.

Ryo heard Maru swallow audibly and a sidelong glance at confirmed his guess. The other man's cheeks were faintly dusted with pink and he was breathing just a little quickly. Good, it wasn't just him then. Ohkura seemed to be oblivious, going for another piece of fruit. Maru was just about to take a step forward when Ryo stopped him with an arm across his chest and a look that clearly stated that this was not the time or place. Maru just shrugged and smiled sheepishly.

"C'mon, Tacchon. We shouldn't stay here too long, let's go back to the main room."

He waved Ohkura ahead of him and the younger man went, bitching about the lack of proper food. Ryo and Maru paused to share an appreciative glance at Ohkura's ass and followed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Yokocho and Hina went this way, right? I thought they found the stairs right over here." Yasu looked each way down the stairless hallway and frowned.

"Maybe? I don't know. A lot of this house looks the same. Let's go left, I like left." Baru tugged Yasu's hand, letting his free hand trail over the smooth wood of the wall as they walked.

They walked close enough for their shoulders to rub, their fingers intertwined. Not because they were frightened, they usually walked like that. The hallway was featureless, no windows, nothing on the walls, until...

"Hey! Buttons!" Subaru stopped abruptly pointing to a small panel that blended nearly perfectly into the wood grain.

Yasu eyed the wall with interest. The rectangular panel was inset with two small buttons emblazoned with arrows that looked for all the world like elevator buttons.

"This can't possibly be what it looks like. The house only has like two floors, right?" 

Subaru pursed his lips in thought, "Yes, but the house did kind of lock us in. Would a magic elevator be very surprising?" Without waiting for an answer he stabbed the button and jumped back, pulling Yasu in front of him and peeking over his shoulder.

Yasu rolled his eyes, "Thanks, I see how it is."

"You're stronger than me!" Subaru protested, "If there is some kind of axe murderer in there, you're more likely to be able to fend him off."

"Thanks?"

A loud ding interrupted any further response Yasu might have been considering. They both eyed the small panel warily, the button with the up arrow was lit up like any other elevator button, seemingly innocuous. 

A moment later an elevator door slid open, marring the seamless wood of the hallway. They leaned forward trying to see as much of the inside as possible without actually being inside. It looked... pretty much like any other elevator, the kind that might be found in a generic office building. It appeared to be completely empty.

"We should go in."

"Baru! What part of a hidden elevator in a potentially dangerously magic house sounds like it would be a good idea to go in?!"

"What, I want to see how many floors it thinks this place has. We wanted to get to the second floor anyway."

Subaru took the opportunity to zip around Yasu while he was considering this argument. "It looks like a normal elevator from in here too. It actually looks like one of the elevators in the jimusho. That one on the far side of the dance studios."

Yasu blinked and followed Baru into the elevator, looking around, "Yeah, kind of! That one that-"

"Always gets stuck." They finished together, eyes wide with dawning horror. The door slid smoothly shut with a quiet whoosh.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

"It's ok! We're all right." Yasu announced as he and Baru swept into the main room.

"Did anyone get brutally murdered while we were gone?"

"Baru!"

"What! Creepy house, valid question."

Yasu surveyed the room, the rest of the group was lounging on a pile of blankets. Ohkura seemed to have been successful in his quest for food if the container of strawberries was any indication. Yoko and Hina seemed to have made it back safely as well, although they looked a bit ruffled and flushed.

"We're fine." Ryo summarized. "No one one was murdered. We didn't even see anything."

"Although the choice of provisions leaves something to be desired." Ohkura mumbled through a mouthful of berries.

Yasu turned to Hina, "Did you guys find the stairs?"

Hina blinked, "Yeah. We found the blankets in the closet up there. Didn't _you_ find the stairs? You were right behind us."

"No. We didn't, we found-"

"An elevator!"

This was met with a chorus of disbelief, except for Maru who poked Yasu in the arm, wanting to know if it was like the magic elevator from the chocolate movie and if they met any candy elves.

Yasu just plopped down and leaned on him until he stopped poking. Baru elaborated, "No. It was just a normal elevator. Although it looked like that one at work that always gets stuck!" 

Yoko cocked his head thoughtfully, "The one past the dance studios?"

"Yes! We got stuck in this one too!"

Ryo cocked an eyebrow, "How did you get out?"

"Well, we just kind of waited."

Subaru scoffed under his breath and winked at Yoko "We did what we always do when we get stuck in that elevator."

Yasu thought it was probably a good time to change the subject, "Did anyone else run into trouble? Anything weird?"

"Hey, did you ever find a bathroom?" Hina asked. Yasu could feel his cheeks flame and he looked at Baru and he could tell from the sparkle in the older man's eyes that he wasn't going to keep this one between the two of them.

"Did we ever. It has a whole huge shower room, it's _communal_." he added, punctuating his sentence with an exaggerated eyebrow waggle. "And there was a medicine cabinet," he declared, looking at everyone in turn clearly waiting for someone to ask.

After a few moments, Maru bit. "What's so crazy about a medicine cabinet?" 

Yasu sighed and dropped his head down into his hand.

"It was _Full_ of lube!"

Ohkura choked on a strawberry, Ryo pounded his back and grinned.

"Seriously, nothing but lube. Shelves of it!"

Hina turned to Yasu, his eyes serious, "You didn't inhale any strange chemicals up there, did you?"

"I don't think so. Did you see anything odd, get stuck anywhere strange?" He was trying to get Hina to drop the subject, he was surprised to see the tips of Hina's ears turn faintly pink.

"Well, there was a minor incident with the closet. Nothing... odd."

Half an hour later there was still no sign of any spirits or demons or crazed men with chainsaws. The front door was still shut tight and their phones were still dead. Someone made the mistake of yawning and it wasn't long before they had curled up in the pile of blankets and dropped off to sleep, one by one. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ohkura hated waking up. It was usually prompted by a blaring alarm and the knowledge that he was going to have to be somewhere in a short amount of time looking fabulous. He had worked looking sleepy into his signature look so he didn't have to wake up all the way for photo shoots. So far, he seemed to be getting away with it.

Other times he had woken up with the bright lights of a camera in his face and Baru screaming at him to 'do something funny!' while an assortment of other band mates snickered sleepily in the background.

This time he came to consciousness slowly, his first thought was that he was really warm and comfortable, despite the fact that his left arm was numb. Why was his left arm numb? He opened his eyes to find his face full of dark hair. He was a little confused until he tried to move his arm. Someone who sounded remarkably like Ryo groaned into his shoulder in protest and then he was very confused. He didn't recognize the ceiling and he knew he wasn't in his own bed. A quick glance around revealed the rest of his band in varying degrees of asleep.

He looked over at Yasu who was the only other person with his eyes open. "We're trapped in a creepy house."

Yasu yawned and snuggled back a little into Subaru's grip, "Yep."

"Lots of weird and unexplained shit, but no one was hurt."

"Yep."

"So we decided it was safe to go to sleep."

"Yep."

Ohkura nodded back, all of his memories confirmed except for one. He looked around at the others and at his own cotton covered arm, "Didn't we go to sleep with our clothes on?"

"Yes..." Yasu looked at him like he might have hit his head and not told anyone. Until he noticed what he was wearing. "I'm wearing a yukata. We're all wearing yukata, but we didn't go to sleep wearing yukata. Where are our clothes?!"

He was sure this was the kind of thing he ought to be really worried about. He wasn't really. Which was a little worrisome in and of itself. He felt a headache coming on. "Maybe if we go back to sleep, the next time we wake up we'll be wearing proper clothes?" he tried, his voice hopeful.

Yasu shot him a withering glance, "Nice try, Tacchon. For all we know the next time we woke up, we'd be naked."

"Who's naked?" Maru asked sleepily, sitting up and dislodging Yoko and Subaru in the process. Subaru squawked at his lack of clothes, waking everyone else up completely.

"No one's naked yet." Yoko muttered and Ohkura couldn't quite tell if he was upset because they were more undressed than Yoko wanted them to be or less.

They all sat around for a few seconds looking sleepy and tousled before Ryo thought to grab his phone and try calling their manager again.

"No dice. Can anyone else get through?"

A few minutes of dialing and head shaking later and they were still incommunicado. Ohkura pouted at his phone and made one last ditch call. He almost dropped his phone in surprise when he heard it ring through.

"Hey, Tacchon. What's up?"

"Junno!" He turned to the others who were giving him looks that ranged from ecstatic to deeply confused. He shrugged and focused on the call that would hopefully get them out of here. "The call went through!"

"Yes. Why wouldn't the call go through?" Junno sounded amused but not surprised. "Are you guys in the mountains for one of your crazy specials? Did something happen?"

"You could say that. We got separated from our manager and we're stuck somewhere and it's weird because we've tried calling all sorts of people, my manager, my parents, but the only call that would go through was this one."

One of the things Ohkura really appreciated about Junno was that he wasn't easily phased. His voice was as cheerful as ever, "Why don't you tell me what's going on and I'll see what I can do."

So he told him. He told him about the bus and the storm and the house that just happened to be right off the road. Without even slowing down he told him about the doors and the phones and the kitchen, pausing for a second to whine about how he hadn't eaten properly in what felt like days. He filled him in on the others' encounters, getting stuck in closets, the mysterious elevator, and the bathroom. By the time he had gotten to the lube and their near complete lack of clothing Junno was cackling so hard he dropped the phone. At least that's what it sounded like from Ohkura's end.

By the time Junno picked the phone up again, Ohkura was scowling. "I know you are like the _king_ of the easily amused but what the hell could possibly be that funny?"

His friend's response was breathless and punctuated by giggling, "Tacchon! You guys... Oh man. Hee!"

Ohkura didn't bother to keep the irritation out of his voice, "That's less than helpful Junno."

"Whew. I don't even know where to start. Ok, ok, have you ever heard of slash fanfiction?"

"No, what is that, and how could it possibly be relevant?"

"Just trust me, I'm going to send you a link to a Wikipedia article, ok? Just read it. I'll wait!"

Ohkura did trust him and despite the odd turn of their conversation, this was their only current link to the outside world so Ohkura muttered to the rest of the group that they 'were working on it', clicked the link open on his browser and read.

He scanned through the article and he could feel his eyes getting wider with each paragraph, he was positive that he was blushing. He was no stranger to the things that his co-workers at the company did behind dressing room doors but this was something else entirely. It's not like he minded that is happened but he was more than a little creeped out by the thought of people _reading_ about it. "Um, ok. That was really weird Junno. I will never be able to think about our fans the same way again, thanks. Why was that helpful?"

"It figures that I'm the only person you were able to call. No one else would get the joke."

Junno's chuckles were warm even across the phone line, Ohkura's hand itched with the need to whap his friend's head. "Junno! The point, get to it!"

"Think about it for a second, Tacchon. You guys are stuck in a creepy horror-movie type house, right? Bus mysteriously broke down, doors are all locked, phones won't work?"

"Yeah, what does that have to do with fictional _gay sex_?!" He could hear the notes of hysteria in his own voice and now he had everyone's full attention. He did his best to ignore the stares although it wasn't easy with Maru poking him in the ribs.

"I'm getting there, yeesh! So the house is also stocked with whipped cream and lube, right? I wouldn't be surprised if there was a closet of sex toys around there somewhere. The house, which happens to be _full_ of _guys_."

There was complete silence on both ends of the line except for Yoko's whispered comment to Hina, "Did he say sex toys just now?" followed by a low grunt when Hina elbowed him in the ribs.

Junno sounded a little disappointed, "C'mon, Tacchon, it's so obvious! You guys are stuck in a **slasher movie**."

Ohkura pulled the phone all the way back from his ear so that he could glare at it with all the vitriol he could personally muster. "That is the worst pun I have ever heard. I hate you."

The KY bastard sounded completely unfazed, "I'm just irked that I didn't come up with it myself!"

"Of course you are. So, what do we _do_ about it?"

"On the bright side you shouldn't have to worry about a crazed and potentially supernatural madman trying to kill you all in the messiest ways possible."

"That's something."

"But... on the other hand, I think that in order to get out you may all have to have a lot of gay sex."

"That's it? _Sex_ is your best suggestion!" He ignored the way some of his band mates eyes lit up. "Ok, Junno. I am hanging up now. I suspect that no matter how this turns out I will require many drinks and I expect you to buy them for me."

He could practically see Junno's grin, "Sure, Tacchon. Good luck! Have fun!"

He could only growl in response and hung up with a vicious stab of the button. He scowled at the phone again for good measure and huffed in irritation before looking up to meet six intensely curious gazes.

Ryo spoke first, "You know you're going to have to explain that whole conversation, right?"

He scrunched up his nose and sighed, "Guys, did you all know about slash fanfiction? Did you know that people write it about us?"

They all looked confused by his questions but they were still met with nods and noises of general agreement.

He hated feeling left out, he crossed his arms over his chest and pouted, "Why didn't any of you ever tell _me_ about it!?!"

Yasu instantly ratcheted up his sweet and innocent look, "Because we were trying to preserve our baby Tacchon's innocence?"

He wasn't at all convinced, he cocked an eyebrow at Yasu and frowned harder.

Maru smiled and shrugged, "Because we assumed you were already as big a pervert as the rest of us?"

Ohkura nodded and turned to Yasu, "See? Better. Far more plausible."

He narrowed his eyes at the group, "You all seem to be pretty comfortable with this idea. Have you messed around like that before?"

Ryo avoided his eyes and tried to hide his blush, Yasu started fidgeting with the hem of his yukata, Hina exhaled hard through his nose, and Yoko just nodded while Maru and Baru high-fived each other.

"What! All of you? All together?!"

Yasu crawled over and leaned into Ohkura's side, snaking an arm around his waist, "It wasn't really that organized, Tacchon. We weren't trying to exclude you from anything.

He was still pissed but he tilted his head over to rest against Yasu's. "So... tell me now. What's been going on?"

He leveled a hard stare at Yoko who cleared his throat and started to explain. "Hina and I have fooled around. And I've slept with Maru. And Hina _and_ Maru."

Maru grinned, "And I've done Shibuyan, and traded blow jobs with Yasu... are we talking just Kanjani here or do you want to hear about other people too?" Hina smacked him on the arm and he shut up.

Yasu nuzzled his cheek into Ohkura's shoulder and added quietly, "Baru and Maru... and there was one time with Hina in the back of a cab.

Hina just grunted his affirmation. Subaru waggled is eyebrows at him and picked up the thread of the conversation, "There's Yasu, of course, and Maru sometimes, and Ryo-chan and I have roomed together before."

Ohkura looked over at Ryo who was by this point completely red. The older man sighed but nodded, "Well, there's Uchi." No one registered surprise at that revelation. Ryo peered at Ohkura like he was trying to predict how Ohkura was going to react. "And you, Tacchon. Do you remember about two years ago in Roppongi, we were both plastered, you came home with me and we stuck our hands down each others' pants?"

Subaru and Yasu burst into giggles while Yoko looked smug. Ohkura opened and closed his mouth a few times before he found his voice again, "That doesn't count, right guys? Does that count!?"

Hina informed him sternly that it absolutely counted, Ryo looked a little hurt and now he felt bad. Crap. "Well, that was enlightening. And handy, because I think we're going to have to have an orgy to get out."

Yoko grinned, "Oh. Is that all?"

Subaru gave him a thumbs up and a beatific smile, "And here I thought this was going to be complicated."

Ryo did not seem to agree with their assessment; he scowled and crossed his arms, "What about seven people all trying to have sex at the same time, _with each other_ isn't complicated?"

Yasu piped up, "Does someone have a video phone? Should we call Uchi-kun and get him in on this?"

"Ryo-chan has a video phone!" Maru supplied. He met Ryo's frown, "What? I know that you and Uchi have 'talked' before. I walked right in on you once, remember?"

Yoko took command of the situation, pointing and issuing orders. "Hina, you and Maru get this bedding in order! Yasu and Baru go get some of that lube! Ryo, call Uchi-kun and fill him in!"

They sprang into action and Ohkura frowned at Yoko, "And what should I do?"

He wasn't sure what he had been expecting but it certainly wasn't a soft smile that lit up Yoko's eyes and made him feel all tingly. "Come over here, Tacchon," he patted the part of the blanket he was sitting on.

When Ohkura sat down, Yoko ran his hand through his hair a few times, nearly petting him. It was incredibly soothing and he couldn't help but enjoy it. After a few moments he could feel himself relaxing. Yoko cupped his face in strong hands and forced him to meet Yoko's dark eyes, "Listen, Tacchon, we don't want you to do anything that freaks you out, ok? Do you think you can handle this?"

He could feel his brow furrow and he opened his mouth to respond but before he could, Yoko leaned in and stole the words off his tongue. Yoko's kiss was powerful but not overtly. It was gentle but insistent, hot and steady. He couldn't help but respond and the longer it went on the more of his inner barriers he could feel crumbling until any resistance he might have had left was swept away by the feel of Yoko's lips on his. He was more than a little dazed when Yoko pulled back, hands warm on his shoulders. "I think I'm good."

He was rewarded by a blinding grin and Yoko pulled him over to lean against his side while they listened to Ryo's phone call.

Apparently the house approved of them communicating with Uchi too. Ohkura wondered if it could somehow gauge how attractive the person on the other end of the line was.

_"So, here's the thing. We're stuck in this weird kind of haunted house type-place."_

_[.....]_

_"Yes,_ kind of _haunted. No, it isn't for our show."_

_[.....]_

_"Listen, will you just shut up for a second and let me explain!"_

_[.....]_

_"Ok, so we're here but we can't get out unless we have sex. With each other. Kind of... all together."_

_[.....]_

_"Yes,_ exactly _like an orgy. Hey! We didn't leave you out on purpose, I'm calling you now aren't I?"_

Ohkura smiled, glad to know he wasn't the only one who worried about things like that. __

_[.....]_

_"Right, except that you probably can't drive out here in time... come to think of it, I'm not entirely sure where here_ is _. So, can we just put you on video?"_

_[.....]_

_"Great."_

Ryo rolled his eyes at Yoko and Ohkura but he was still smiling. "Now where can I set this up." He looked across the room and dragged an empty box over and arranged the phone so that the lens and the screen were situated correctly. "I'm sure this wasn't over there a few minutes ago, but what the hell."

By that time Hina and Maru had come back and were spreading the blankets out in slightly more organized fashion. Yasu and Baru ambled over and dumped an armful of lube next to Yoko who grinned, "I don't know if we'll need all that."

Yasu just smiled, "Better safe than sorry!" he said as Baru caroled, "We brought a whole assortment of flavors!"

They were all back, lounging around on the blankets just like earlier, except now there was a discernible tension in the air. Ohkura could feel the anticipation dance along his skin, he repressed a shiver. "So, how do we start one of these things?" he asked trying not to sound as nervous as he felt.

Yoko looked around, "Everyone good? Uchi, you with us?"

"Yes, leader!" Uchi's voice was faint but understandable through the phone.

Yoko turned to Ohkura and suddenly he was very close, his hands sliding into Ohkura's hair and pulling him forward to brush their lips together. "Like this," he murmured against Ohkura's mouth just before he invaded Ohkura's senses with another of those deep, hot kisses.

"Oh, yeah. I'm with you alright." He distantly registered the sound of Uchi's voice in the background, the rustling of cloth, the sounds of other people kissing.

Yoko pulled away and smiled again, making Ohkura's gut churn, before he turned him around so that he faced the rest of the group. Yoko spoke low in his ear as he dragged one of his hands up Ohkura's side and beckoned Ryo over with the other, "Watch."

He did his best to keep his eyes open, despite their inclination to drift closed as Yoko's lips trailed down his neck, dropping soft kisses interspersed with gentle bites. Ryo knelt down in front of him, eyes intent on Ohkura's expression as he slowly slid his hands up Ohkura's thighs. Ryo's hands slipped under the short hem of his yukata and left trails of fire as they worked their way up, he stopped just before he reached Ohkura's groin. His eyes smoldered as he looked up at Ohkura through his lashes and murmured, "All right, Tacchon?"

Yoko sunk his teeth into the curve of his shoulder just as he had opened his mouth to respond. He ground back against Yoko and felt him hard against his back. He could only gasp and nod emphatically. Ryo's mouth quirked up in a flashfire grin as he parted the folds of Ohkura's robe to lap at the head of his achingly hard cock.

He would have thrown his head back at the sensation had Yoko not had a hand firmly entwined in his hair, "Watch, Tacchon." he admonished. Yoko returned to sucking marks to life on his shoulders while Ryo tried to suck his brains out through his cock. He writhed in their hold and followed orders.

Maru and Yasu had Baru naked and trapped between them. The oldest was straddling Maru's lap while Yasu and Maru kissed heatedly over his shoulder. Yasu had slicked his fingers and was sliding them into Baru who wasn't bothering at all to contain his operatic moans. Hina knelt right behind Yasu, sliding teasing fingers lightly up and down the shorter man's cock.

Yasu pulled away from the kiss and pronounced Baru ready. Maru grinned and steadied Baru with strong hands as he sunk down onto Maru's cock. Maru whined at the sensation, Baru nuzzled their noses together and started to rock, catching Maru's moan against his lips. Hina had pulled Yasu away and pushed him gently down on his back but Ohkura's attention was torn away by the feeling of slick fingers tracing the crease of his ass.

Ryo looked up past Ohkura's shoulder and he must have been looking at Yoko, because his eyes went wicked and he did something amazing with his tongue just as Yoko slid a finger slow and deep inside Ohkura. His body jerked as the pleasure spiked in his veins, Yoko crooked a finger and Ryo tightened his mouth around him and he was coming harder than he ever had before, spilling hot down Ryo's throat.

Yoko's voice was dark silk in his ear, "I want to have you, Tacchon. Is that ok?" 

Ohkura was gratified by the slight hitch in the older man's breath when he answered quickly and honestly, "Fuck yes. _Please_." Another finger slid in with the first and he gasped at the sensation. He shook his head a little to clear it. Hina was taking Yasu with smooth, powerful strokes, the shorter man was bent nearly double, his legs thrown up over Hina's shoulders and moaning in counterpoint to Hina's deep groans. Yasu had one hand thrown up over his head, fingers intertwined with Baru's as the eldest rode Maru jerkily. Baru had his other wrapped around himself, flying up and down his own cock. It didn't look like he was going to last long. Ryo had moved closer to the phone and was leisurely touching himself, punctuating his narration of the scene with rough moans, presumably for Uchi's benefit. If Ohkura listened carefully, he could hear Uchi talking back, could hear his breathy voice mingling with Ryo's.

Yasu's back arched up as he came, slick across his stomach and Hina slowed his hips, lowered Yasu's legs down and leaned over to kiss him gently as Yasu clung to his muscular shoulders. Baru followed him a breath later, throwing his head back and wailing. Hina and Maru exchanged a grin, Hina pulled away let Yasu move over to snuggle up to Baru. They twined their arms around each other kissing softly as Maru let himself fall forward on his hands and knees so Hina could prepare him.

Ryo was suddenly right in front of him, commanding all of Ohkura's attention with a fierce kiss. Ohkura felt himself being urged forward and down. Ryo lay back and pulled Ohkura right down against him, grinding their hips together as Ohkura moaned helplessly into his mouth. Ryo tore his mouth away to gasp, "Now, Kimi."

Yasu and Baru broke their kiss, turning their heads; Maru looked up and Hina, right behind him, paused the fluid motion of his hips to look. Ryo was gazing up at him, dark eyes warm. He was sure Uchi was out there somewhere, watching. The only one he couldn't see was Yoko, but he heard him, heard his soft, needy moan and he slid forward slowly, so slowly into Ohkura's tight heat. Ohkura blinked eyes blind with sensation, it felt tight, but not painful, just overwhelming... this feeling of being filled. Ryo leaned up to gently kiss his cheek and wrapped his legs around Ohkura's hips, reaching a hand down to slick Ohkura's erection before he pushed hips up, impaling himself on Ohkura and wrenching a gasp from both of them.

Yoko slid a warm, comforting hand down his spine as he trembled, trapped between them. A breathless moment passed, Yoko pulled back and plunged forward again. " _Yes,_ "Yoko hissed between clenched teeth and established a rhythm drove Ohkura forward into Ryo who canted his hips up to meet Ohkura's thrusts.

He distantly heard Maru's wail of completion and Hina follow him but he was mired in his own pleasure and could only really see Ryo's dark eyes, admire the flush riding high on his cheeks, appreciate his sharp moan as Ohkura freed a hand to wrap around him, stroking in time with Yoko's hips. Ohkura knew he was close, he could feel Yoko pounding against a spot inside him that made stars burst white-hot across his vision. Ryo was almost unbearably tight around him and though he had just come, he knew he wasn't going to last long at all. He desperately wished he could see Yoko's face. The older man was nearly silent behind him, his movements were fluid and his hands on Ohkura's hips and back were gentle but powerful. Ohkura was sure he must look beautiful.

He felt Ryo tremble beneath him and the other man lost it, slicking both of their stomachs with his release. Yoko paused to let Ryo extricate himself, sprawling backwards against Maru, who wrapped an arm around him. Ohkura looked up at the others watching him as Yoko pulled him up and back against him, fitting them back together just as they were in the beginning, Ohkura's back tightly pressed against Yoko's chest. He could feel his orgasm hovering just out of reach, the slight movement of his body against Yoko's causing Yoko to brush against that gland deep inside him. When he got his voice to work, it sounded more than a little whiny, "Yoko...please. I want- I need... _please_."

Yoko slid one strong arm across his abdomen and the other into his hair, turning Ohkura's head just enough to brush their lips together, "Alright, Tacchon. Here we go." It was all Ohkura could do to hang on as Yoko thrust up into him hard and relentless, sending fire arching up Ohkura's spine with each motion. Yoko dropped one of his hands down to tease the sensitive head of Ohkura's cock and Yoko had barely touched him when he felt his muscles spasm. His mind went blank, he could distantly hear himself chanting Yoko's name under his breath as the waves of pleasure rolled over him. He felt Yoko bury his face in his shoulder and heard the other man's still quiet whimper as he shuddered and released inside him.

They stilled but didn't move, clinging to each other as their breathing slowed. Ohkura turned just enough to meet Yoko's eyes and smile at the fondness there. They all stayed just like that for a few moments until a tinny voice broke the comfortable silence. "Damn, that was hot. You guys should be idols or something!"

Maru was the first to lose it, falling over to the side with the force of his guffaws. The rest of them followed, reduced to a helpless, giggling pile of limbs. They stayed just like that until one of them had the bright idea to hunt down that huge shower.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

They found the shower and had just finished cleaning up when Hina, who was the first out, exclaimed that he'd found their clothes. They followed him out of the shower room to see their clothes all in a row of neatly folded piles.

No sooner had they had gotten dressed and trooped back down the stairs, than Yoko's phone rang cheerfully. He raised his brows in surprise and answered, listening for a moment before mouthing 'manager' to the rest of them. They followed him back to the front door which opened easily under his hand to reveal their manager, perfectly calm and right where they last saw him.

"The door must have gotten stuck. Maybe the house is old, but I still can't believe it took twenty minutes to get it open!" their manager fretted as they exchanged meaningful looks. Ryo noticed that the sky was still dark, he glanced down at his phone and it told him that it was indeed, only twenty minutes past the time they had entered the house.

"But," their manager continued cheerfully, "the rain has stopped and the bus is fixed. We should be at the hotel within an hour."

They trooped dutifully behind him, back down the hill. And if they were walking a little closer, if there were a few more hands intertwined than before, certainly none of their crew noticed enough to comment on it.

Ryo bumped his shoulder gently against Ohkura's as the settled back onto the bus, "So, how are you feeling?"

Ohkura looked thoughtful, "Well, now I'm going to wonder if I'm being watched all the time."

"Well, yeah but you're an idol." Ryo grinned, "You perform better with an audience."

The younger man laughed, "True. Yeah... for a creepy haunted house it was completely awesome." He looked up a few rows and caught Yoko's wink. "Definitely more preferable than the other kind of slasher."

The bus pulled away and they were off, the house disappeared behind a bend in the road. Ohkura slumped down and said just loud enough for the rest of the group to hear, "I hope we don't have to wait until next Halloween to do that again."


End file.
